Family, Shame, and Becoming Yourself | Legally Clueless Ep359 Part 1

In this first episode of 2026, we open the year with Part One of Hekaya’s story, a deeply reflective and honest conversation about family, identity, and the long road toward becoming yourself. Hekaya  shares what it was like growing up as the last born in a family where expectations, religion, and control shaped how safe she felt to express who she truly was.

She reflects on sibling dynamics, loneliness within family systems, creativity as a lifeline, and the subtle ways shame can be inherited and internalised. This episode lays the emotional foundation for a larger story, one that also touches on Hekaya’s experience with terminating a pregnancy, the guilt that followed, and her journey toward healing and self-compassion. That part of her story continues in Part Two, which will be released next week.

This is a conversation about understanding yourself beyond the roles you were assigned, and about recognising that even siblings raised in the same home can experience entirely different childhoods. If you’ve ever questioned your place within your family, felt unseen by those closest to you, or found safety in chosen family instead, this episode is for you.

KEY THEMES

• Sibling relationships and emotional safety
• Birth order and identity formation
• Family expectations vs self-expression
• Creativity as survival and self-definition
• Shame, religion, and control in African households
• Beginning the journey toward healing

COMING NEXT 🔔 Part Two of Hekaya’s story drops next week, where she speaks more deeply about reproductive choice, guilt, healing, and reclaiming her voice.

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If this episode resonated, please share it with someone who might need it, leave us a review, and come back next week for Part Two. You are not alone and your healing matters.