Should You Tell Your Kids The Truth About Their Cheating Father?

About 20 years into your marriage, you find out that your husband has been cheating on you with your neighbor. You and he go to therapy to try and fix the marriage. While you’re devastated, you remain hopeful because you believe that therapy is going to help your communication, right the wrongs, and ultimately heal the marriage. Fast forward, and you find out the reason he wanted to go to therapy was to break up with you, ask you for a divorce, and leave you and your three children behind. Should you tell your children the truth- can you tell them why daddy is leaving and what he did? Or do you keep your husband’s secret and withhold the truth from your kids? Conventional wisdom tells the wife “keep your mouth shut and don’t involve your kids.” But is that point of view outdated? Why should the betrayed wife suffer in silence and participate in her cheating husband’s cover up? Is it right to be evasive with the kids when they start asking questions? What do you think? What would you do? The guest’s name has been changed and her voice has been altered to protect her privacy.