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Society & Culture

Ep 030: It's Not Disrespectful to Disagree with Your Mother

ebony July 29, 2024

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We’ve heard a lot about how mothers sacrifice everything to fulfill society's expectations of them, despite the trauma they may carry. Every mother deserves respect and honor, especially from their children. However, we cannot expect them to be perfect in every way. There will always be shortcomings or mistakes along their parenting journey. Sometimes, children will disagree with their mothers about certain things, especially as they grow up.

In our society, there's a strong belief that disagreeing with our moms is always disrespectful or rebellious. It can make us feel like we're doing something terribly wrong, even sinful, leading to guilt and self-doubt. Thus, we must realize that disagreeing with our mothers doesn't mean we don't love or respect them. It means we're learning to think for ourselves and make decisions. Healing from this mother wound means setting healthy boundaries and choosing paths that support our well-being without feeling guilty. Remember, respect goes both ways, and part of that respect is allowing space for open communication and understanding.

In this episode, I will unravel the myths surrounding disagreeing with your mother, redefine what it means to honor our mothers while honoring ourselves, and explore how to approach disagreements with integrity and courage.

Topics Covered:

(00:00:00) Episode Snippet

(00:00:46) The myth of disagreeing with your mother

(00:02:31) Unique challenges of the black mother wound

(00:03:43) A mother’s fear of losing control

(00:05:43) To disagree is to disrespect

(00:06:46) The price of speaking truth to our mothers

(00:09:43) What does respect truly entail?

(00:12:36) How can I honestly disagree with my mother?

(00:13:52) What will happen if you do things differently?

(00:16:27) A mother’s love will encourage independence

(00:19:14) How do I get her to see me?

(00:21:15) Feeling guilty is not guilty

(00:23:34) To disagree is to set your boundary

Key Takeaways:

"You cannot heal your life without your life-changing. You're going to have to do things differently."– Jennifer Arnise

"Feeling guilty is not guilty, it's a programming that you have in your mind that when you advocate for yourself you are wrong in any way."– Jennifer Arnise

DISCLAIMER: I am not a licensed psychologist, medical doctor, or health care professional and my services do not replace the care of psychologists, doctors or other healthcare professionals. All opinions expressed here are my own. If you feel you are in any danger of harming yourself please call 911. I am not providing health care, medical or nutritional therapy services, or attempting to diagnose, treat, prevent or cure any physical, mental or emotional issue, disease or condition. All opinions are my own and based on my personal lived experience.

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