Are you shrinking yourself to feel safer, more lovable, less intimidating? In this episode of The Mid Week Tease, Adelle reflects on the quiet ways women, especially African women, make themselves smaller in their careers, relationships, and ambitions. Inspired by her recent conversation with Ruth Tanui on Difference She Makes, this episode explores:
- The psychology behind the confidence gap
- Why women hesitate to apply even when qualified
- The social conditioning that teaches girls to be excellent but not intimidating
- The myth of “scaring men away” with success
- How to build confidence by acting before you feel ready
- Practical mindset shifts to stop downplaying your power
Drawing on research from Albert Bandura on self-efficacy, social psychology studies on the backlash effect, and insights from thinkers like Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie and Warsan Shire, this episode invites you to examine where you may be shrinking and what expansion could look like instead. If you have ever:
- Downplayed your title
- Softened your ambition
- Hidden your success
- Hesitated to apply
- Made yourself smaller to feel safer
This conversation is for you. You do not have to shrink to be chosen.
You do not have to dim to be loved.
You are allowed to expand.
Watch Difference She Makes featuring Ruth Tanui here:
https://youtu.be/1DBpamU6VXQ
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