Pleasure, Freedom & The Myth Of The Good Woman | Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah
What does it mean to be a “good woman”?
And who benefits when women spend their lives trying to fit into that role?
In the first episode of this special season of For Mannerless Women, Adelle Onyango sits down with writer, activist and author Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah for a deeply liberating conversation about pleasure, freedom, womanhood and self-definition! Together, they unpack the fear-based messages many African women receive about intimacy, the pressure to be socially acceptable, the complicated relationship many women have with their bodies, and what it takes to build a life rooted in curiosity, autonomy and joy.
Nana also reflects on lessons from documenting the stories of African women across the continent, the inspiration behind her books The Sex Lives of African Women and Seeking Sexual Freedom, and why reclaiming pleasure is about far more than intimacy, it’s about reclaiming ourselves. In this episode:
- The messages African girls receive about being a “good woman”
- Growing up with fear, shame and silence around intimacy
- Learning to feel at home in your body
- Body image, beauty standards and self-acceptance
- Why pleasure is political
- The freedom to define womanhood for yourself
- Unlearning what no longer serves you
- Reclaiming African traditions around pleasure and womanhood
- Why curiosity can be a pathway to liberation
- Creating a life that feels like freedom
Connect With Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah:
Website: https://www.darkoathewriter.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dfordarkoa
Substack: https://substack.com/@nanadarkoa
The Sex Lives of African Women: https://www.instagram.com/thesexlivesofafricanwomen
Sexual Freedom Festival: https://www.instagram.com/sexualfreedomfestival
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If this conversation resonated with you, share it with the mannerless, or almost mannerless, women in your life.
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