Many women don’t struggle because they’re “too emotional.”
They struggle because they’ve learned to abandon their emotional needs to keep connection. In this episode of Mid Week Tease, we explore the quiet, often invisible ways women self-silence in romantic relationships, friendships, and family not because they lack needs, but because expressing them once felt unsafe. This conversation unpacks emotional self-abandonment, where it comes from, how it shows up across relationships, and the psychological cost of constantly choosing harmony over honesty. Drawing from attachment theory, trauma-informed psychology, and family systems theory, this episode offers both language and tools for women who are tired of disappearing to be loved. In this episode, we explore:
- What emotional self-abandonment actually looks like
- Why many women minimise, over-give, or stay silent in relationships
- How early attachment patterns shape emotional self-silencing
- Emotional labour and the pressure to be “low maintenance”
- The role family systems play in teaching women to shrink
- The long-term effects of abandoning your emotional needs
- Practical tools to begin expressing needs without shame
Psychology-backed frameworks referenced:
- Attachment theory (John Bowlby)
- Trauma-informed understanding of emotional suppression (Gabor Maté)
- Family systems & differentiation (Murray Bowen)
- The True Self vs False Self (Donald Winnicott)
Gentle reflection prompts from the episode:
- Where do I silence myself to preserve connection?
- Whose comfort do I prioritise over my emotional truth?
- What do I need not what will keep the peace?
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